My life as a grown up

Back by popular demand: posts from moi.

Tonight I shall discuss the engagement ring as a necessary distraction for people just learning about a couples' engagement.

The engagement ring provides material distraction from the impending importance of commitment. For example, someone gets engaged after dating for six months. She announces to her girlfriends that she is getting married. Then, everyone looks at the ring. She proudly holds out her hand and smiles excitedly. Instead of the more important questions, like "Are you sure it's not too soon?" the attention is pointed to the ring: carats, gold vs. white gold vs. platinum, etc.. Also included in the social distractions are: "How did he ask you?" and "Did you cry?" Perhaps, the real question is: why, in our world today, are we afraid to ask our friends the important questions.

Soon after, her life is clouded with wedding planning and more material details like favors and place settings and while you were too busy talking about her ring, you forgot to make sure she was really ok.

Asking the "real" questions does not have to be as harsh as it sounds. You can do it with tact and grace and without coming across as questioning the relationship. However, by simply asking the question, you plant a seed in that friend's head that there are more questions to be asked. If you ask a person who is confident in their decision to marry (and use tact and grace, of course) then you will do no wrong. But it just may be your responsibility to make them examine their situation.

So next time someone gets engaged, ask the important questions...


...after you ooh and ahh over her ring.

Disclaimer: This in no way shape or form relates to any specific occurrence in my own personal life.